four months old

the littlepages.

promise i love jen.

she's just always the one behind the camera.

[i know these two are basically the same.

but i can't stand to only

show you one.

it just wouldn't be fair.]

enjoyed being [thankful] together this year.

war eagle

hey.

three months

... and we look nothing alike.

except for when he does this:

filled to be emptied

here we are.

and i absolutely love it here.

thought we'd stay for 3 months.

3 actually turned into 12.

12 until we head back to the other side of the world.

which feels like forever away from home.

[which is why He is allowing time to grow my desire.

and time to grow scott's patience.]

even since the very first day of arriving "home", i've thought ...

wow, father. i've never experienced the richness of your kindness like this.

AND

ever since then, i've heard Him telling me that the very purpose of being filled in this season is to be emptied in the next.

dear noah,

figure out your days and nights.

we're not in china anymore.

love,

mom and dad

can we say

STRONG similarities?

noah.

scott.

just another lovely part of being home. old pictures

and baby books to file through.

noah.

scott.

i'd love to say that when i head over to my parents' house

i'll find some baby pictures

that look like noah,

but i'm afraid the only similar ones

will be where we're smiling ...

with our eyes "closed".

the things they make you say.

i know it's weird.

but this face makes me blurt out

cutie patootie.

and just because i had to show you the

rest of the pictures from

yesterday.

he loved staring at our curtains. white curtains. what the heck is

so interesting about that? as scott says, "we may never know".

this looks like a little school photo or something.

or maybe a picture showing the

definition of a square head.

[the pictures look a little different because i was messing with the different settings. don't ask me why i feel the need to say that, i just do. it was bothering me to think of not mentioning it.]

5 more days

counting down 'til our families get to see these

sweet cheeks.

so pucker up and get ready.

what i'm just a learnin'

scott went to china this weekend.

first time alone with noah.

so of course i called mom at a low point yesterday.

and heard a good word from her.

she said He gives me :

"grace for what is, not what if..."

not sure about you, but when things

get blah i start doing the what if.

ready?

what if i seriously can't do this by myself.

what if it doesn't get easier like people say.

oh gosh, what if something happens to scott.

what if then i really am by myself.

what if blah blah blah.

as dramatic or trivial as they are, i think them.

you can just wear out those what ifs. that's when mom said it. don't go down the road of what if. He gives me grace [in other words: supply] for what is. for the now. and if one of the what ifs happened, then there'd be His supply for that need right then as well.

one day at a time. surrendered day.

a baby brings a whole new meaning to that.

so i woke up today to find more.

wanting to be "shattered".

i loved reading that word this morning.

with all the adjustment lately, i need my present perspective of Christ to be shattered.

i don't want my mind to be bogged down.

i want my mind on the things of God, not the things of man.

He is readjusting me. He's doing it by

finishing in me something that only this current situation can do.

some people may wonder [and i ask myself]:

"do you feel like

these past few weeks in hk

have been pointless?"

"wouldn't you rather have spent those first 7 weeks of

noah's life back "home"?"

"now that you're moving from hk,

do you think you should have just come

back to auburn to have the baby and stay there?"

NO.

because He is finishing in us something that only this situation can do.

he brings about NEW situations so that

we can become NEW in character.

so here i am, hoping for that abundance.

that as i am seeking newness in Him, i will find it.

and find it in abundance.

Something we wanted to share...

This definitely brought us back to riding in the back seat listening to cassette tapes with our moms. It was such a blessing to both of us today. We felt like sharing it with you. It's one of those songs that just seem to pull the words right out of your heart. The ones that you've been longing to pour out before Him.

he's a daddy.

crazy to look at scott and think : wow you're a dad.

and i'm a mom.

what in the world.

he seriously is not an ordinary dad.

i can't explain it.

you'll just have to be around the two of these guys to experience what i mean.

a favorite little tid bit of mine

lately

is how scott sings to wake noah up.

i sing him to sleep.

scott sings him awake.

that joyful noisemaker has come in handy.

strike a pose

he's 4 weeks old.

picture post.

hopefully nobody cares that i'm not putting many words on this one.

ever since the being a mom thing started,

i've felt a slight release of trying to "people please".

it feels good. you should try it.

all my brain can think is

EAT. CHANGE DIAPER. WAKE UP. SLEEP.

repeat cycle.

repeat cycle.

repeat cycle.

again, and again.

with that said, who has brain space to even blog? so here are some pictures

that we hope can show you how our days have been [of course,

we don't have any pictures of Noah

crying, but i can assure you that definitely takes place.]

we love our little baby. so much it hurts.